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Child Abuse: When Will We Stop the Killing?
by LaVonne Boruk
The newspaper headlines screamed, "2-year-old boy beaten to death."
These kinds of headlines grab our attention and refuse to let go. When will it stop? The article goes on to tell us the coroner said the baby was most probably beaten with a fist and the blows went to the head, chest, stomach, leaving bruises all over the child's body. The baby was put to bed after the beating and bled to death, the coroner said, from a blow that slashed his liver.
The mother is a 17 year old who is five months pregnant. Her live-in boyfriend is the murderer of this innocent and helpless little 30-pound boy. He is 26 years old and the baby had been left in his care while the mother worked. The beating was done because the child "wouldn't stop crying and whining."
What an excuse!
When will people realize that small children cry as a way of communicating some need? Maybe it's only a diaper change or maybe they're hungry, or maybe they hurt somewhere. Or maybe they just need to hear a kind, loving voice. They can't talk very well, and crying is the only way they have to get the attention of those who are supposed to love and cherish them. Those who are supposed to see that no harm comes to them!
Seventeen years old and the mother of a two year old and another one on the way. She must have been 14 at the most when she became pregnant. And now, at 17, she is half-way through another pregnancy.
Where is the baby's father? Is he another 17 year old? Or is he another older man? The newspaper didn't mention him, but I can't help but wonder. And where are the child's grandparents? Didn't anyone give a damn about this little boy?
What makes some people think it's okay to use little ones for punching bags? What was the mother thinking when she left him alone with her child?
It's sad enough that a young girl becomes pregnant in the first place, because she is not capable of raising the child and supporting it and herself, too. Neither is the young father capable, or often even willing, to take on that responsibility. But someone has to see that the child is fed, clothed, loved, and protected from evil.
I wonder how that young (?) father feels now, knowing that his child has been beaten to death. Does he care? And how do the grandparents feel? Do they care? It seems to me if they did they would have done something before now, because there was a history of abuse in that family.
How do we get the killing to stop? The killer is likely to have plenty of time in prison to regret his actions. He was charged with homicide by child abuse. And the mother charged with being an accessory after the fact.
Young women need to know what can happen to their children when they leave them in the care of a live-in boyfriend who is not the child's father. Too often we read about men murdering their girlfriend's child or children. Not all of them do, and I don't mean to condemn the innocent. But it's something that young single mothers need to know and be concerned about.
We need to educate our youngsters, both boys and girls, beginning at an early age, about the humdrumness of every day life. They need to be able to see that all is not romance and happy every after. They must learn that babies do happen, even the first time they have sex, and babies need a lot of love, a lot of the parents' time, and a lot of money for their support, and they do cry at times. They need to learn how to cope with a crying baby, how to soothe the child, and furnish what the child needs. Caring for a child properly is a lot of hard work, and it's a long-term job—up to eighteen years. And it doesn't necessarily get easier as the years go by. Our children need to be taught reality, not fantasy. They need to know that a few moments of pleasure can bring a lifetime of happiness—or sorrow. Usually, it's a little of both, when everything goes right; but can be hellish when it doesn't.
Who knows what this little boy might have become? He might have grown up to be president, or an inventor of something wonderful for the world, or accomplished some other outstanding thing, if only he'd had the opportunity to grow up strong and healthy. In addition to the horrible death of this and other babies and young children at the hands of those who are entrusted with their care, these young people have had their lives changed forever. They could have become decent law-abiding, caring, and productive citizens, instead of facing the fate that probably awaits them now—prison inmates for many years. I wonder how their parents feel knowing that? I weep for all of them.
©2001 LaVonne Boruk
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